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Moving. Bittersweet.

Last I posted we were considering selling our home and were putting it on the market.

I’m happy to report that our house sold in 9 days! Not too surprising.  It really is a great home. It’s beautiful, open, and spacious.  It just became a little too spacious for us.  I was confident going in to this process, then as soon as it sold I began to experience sadness.  I’ll admit I have a hard time with change. This has been home for almost 4 years. This house is right around the corner from the home I grew up in.  My high school is just down the street. The Publix shopping market I’ve been going to since I was 13 is within walking distance.  This is the home where my mom, mother-in-law, and I painted the nursery when I found out I was pregnant.  (I was so adamant that his walls not be BLUE, but AQUA). In our bedroom is where we got the phone call in the middle of the night that my father-in-law was in the ER, and when we returned home that evening our world had changed due to his passing. Two days later my water broke in this house.  We brought Blake home to here. This is where he first rolled over. First crawled. Took his first steps. Learned to climb stairs. There’s a gray spot of paint in our master bath where I spilled paint when Michael thought it would be funny to start tickling me with a big wet brush in my hand, and I dropped it.  I know in my heart we are meant to move. God has opened up the door and we have walked through, and he’s assured me this is the right thing. But it doesn’t change my emotions.  Blake won’t even remember this place, and I suppose that’s hard on me.

I look down the hallway from where I’m sitting at my desk, and I see the hallway that leads to the loft. Nothing is as it was 2 weeks ago.  If only I could turn back time, just to get some order.  The problem with what’s going on right now is that I feel like I don’t have a sure place to call home.  That’s just something I’ve made up in my head, and I know it sounds silly.  You know after you’ve had a long-hard day at work, and all you want to do is just come home and relax? When I’m at work, I don’t feel like I have that right now.  I know I have to come home and pack, but I also know that this isn’t home. I feel like I have to start removing myself from this place in order to prepare my heart for the impending departure. When we lay our keys on a table and walk away.

The good news is that we have moved forward with the purchasing of a home we fell in love with in the next town over, Oakland. It was the first home Michael and I agreed on, and the first home we were “wow’ed” over. Just hard to imagine it as home until it’s official and we are settled. It’s a 4 bedroom, 2 bath (Soooooooo cheering at the fact that I will not have FOUR bathrooms to clean any more).  Surprisingly, it has all the same rooms we have now, just minus some square footage.  (Okay, minus 1,000+ square footage, but really, all the same rooms!) We’ve already decided to put a pool in the moment we get settled, so that’s exciting.

There’s been some snafus so far with all of this. The home we are buying is owned by a corporation, so it’s taken longer to get things signed and passed down through the ranks. Thankfully, we’ve gotten an extension on our move out date. Initially, we had to be out of our home May 11 (TWO WEEKS), but we now have until the end of May. Still, right around the corner.

After this whole process, I just really hope we never move again.  I said that with this house, but I’m thinking I really mean it this time. It’s really not a fun process.  I just want to get to the other side and make it home. (Have I used that word enough in this post yet?) Right now, piles of boxes and paper surround me and it’s completely overwhelming.  I’d like to wake up tomorrow and every thing to just be done with!

Needless to say, I’m trying really hard over here NOT to stress out. Take one day at a time. Have faith in God. Not let the current disarray of my home send me in to an anxiety fit, and just breathe.

I’d like a time machine to fast forward and just take me to June.

Speaking of, and waaaay off topic, did any one else get excited at the idea of a Back to the Future reboot that came out earlier this month? Then realize it was just an April Fool’s joke.  Man!

Anyway.

We just wait at this point. That is, wait while we pack. See how things continue to move forward with this house, and accept the life changes that are coming our way.  Because, there are changes coming. Boy, are there always life changes! (No, I am NOT pregnant!) Sheesh, people! 😉

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